I Was Pretty Sure

Almost ten years ago now, I graduated high school. The early Arizona summer was in full swing so the school provided water so that we would all be good and hydrated. At the table where the water cups were stood my sophomore geometry teacher, whom I had liked very much. Jokingly, I asked her, "Never thought I'd make it, did you?" To which she replied rather matter-of-factly, "No, I was pretty sure you were going to make it." I have thought about that experience ever since that day. Even my flippant disregard for my own abilities was met with an attitude of confusion and disbelief. She believed in me, she had always believed in me, and made sure that I knew it. I don't even remember her name, but I remember her face and her words.

The musical Les Miserable contains within it a song called Bring Him Home, a very touching song about one man's wish for another's well-being, even at the expense of his own. He pleads for God to give rest, peace and life to the poor soul whom he loves dearly. His plea is similar to Christ's plea for all of us. Even in his pronouncement that Marius is like the son he might have known, he is echoing the words of King Benjamin in the Book of Mormon that we become the sons and daughters of Christ through faith. If you listen to it from this perspective, Christ is pleading for each of us to return to Heavenly Father, even at the expense of His own life.

The story of the Candy Bomber is one that I love. One soldier who orchestrated a world-wide effort to deliver not only candy to the children of East Berlin, but also hope. The candy represented much more than momentary pleasure for the recipients. It represented love from some unknown person, and undoubtedly came in moments of desperate need to buoy up the spirits of those caught in the turmoil of the time.

Jesus Christ can be each of these things to us in times of need and in times of plenty. He can be that voice that says, very bluntly, "I know you can do it." He is our advocate, pleading our cause, aching for our return home so that He may embrace us and show us how very much He loves us. He can be our Candy Bomber, dropping packages in the form of the right person or word at the right time. Sometimes, He simply wants us to know that there is indeed someone out there, closer than we may think, who loves us. The thing is, He is always there, speaking, pleading and gifting. Sometimes, though, we may turn a deaf ear, turn prideful or be blinded by the turmoil in our own lives, missing the sweet things raining down on us from Heaven.

I have often wondered why it is so important that Christ came as a child, and why we celebrate it. I think it is imperative to understand that Christ came as He did precisely so that He could be the Advocate we need. What better advocate than one who can say, "I have stood where they stand, and can testify of their tribulations"? It is the very fact that He grew from an infant to the Man who died on the cross that He can be our Savior. Were it any other way, He could not be who He is. That is why we celebrate His birth. That is why we celebrate His life. That is how He can succor us. May we open our eyes, ears and hearts to our Savior, especially at this season. Merry Christmas, and God bless us, every one.

Video Testimony

These are two videos I made to express how I feel about the Savior and His life:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N80_9Aw0wuc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYfNVO8lgyg&feature=plcp
Thanks for watching, please feel free to share and post, they are meant to uplift those who need it!

Evil Queen Vs. Wicked Witch

My new obsession, for anyone who cares, is called Once Upon a Time. It's a TV show that takes all the fairy tales and turns them on their heads, albeit a little unDisneylike. One of the things it endeavors to answer is why does the evil queen hate Snow White so much? The play Wicked attempts to answer the same question about the Wicked Witch. Dumbledore in Harry Potter makes a point to educate Harry about his enemy, what made him the way that he was. On my mission I had an interesting conversation with an elder, during which we disagreed on whether it matters how someone like the Wicked Witch got to be so wicked. For him, the bottom line was that she is, in fact, wicked, and it does not matter how she got that way. For me, it goes beyond that. Understanding why someone is evil doesn't make them any less evil, it simply makes them, well, more understandable. It means that they are not simply evil for the sake of being evil. There is more to them than meets the eye. It changes me, not them.

We all have bits of evil in us. The natural man, sinful self, enemy to God. Whatever you call it, all it means is that we are all, more or less, just like the villains we love to hate. The difference between us and them is that they have embraced their sins, and let them define them. The more we let jealousy, fear and pessimism rule our lives, the more like them we become. So, does it really matter why? Yes, and I'll tell you why. Because we learn to be that way. We learn how to sin. Early in life, our imperfect minds and bodies give our spirits a run for their money and we learn how to sin. It's just that simple. The ever-present good news is that if we can learn how to be a certain way, we can certainly unlearn the same thing. It takes time, but we can go from being the Evil Queen to Snow White, lovely and loving and pure. Because if the Evil Queen has a back story, so does Snow White, which means Snow learned how to be good, just as the Queen learned how to be evil. We get to choose. So, who will you choose to be?

Knowing

Pornography is not intimacy. Pornography is a distortion of reality. Intimacy between a man and a woman celebrates their love for one another and brings them closer together. It is mind, body and spirit melding together. The scriptures refer to intimacy using the word "know". To know something is to be familiar with, perceive, understand. It requires experience. Which is exactly the way the Lord intended intimacy to be in the first place. If you do not know someone in a personal sense, you cannot know them in the Lord's sense. Which is how pornography distorts the true meaning of what it means to love someone. To love someone for the physical pleasure they give you is to view them as an object, something to be discarded when it no longer suits you. The truth is, you can always be pleased physically, but emotionally, spiritually, those take someone special. Someone willing to know you as you would know them. Someone to hold you when the tears come unbidden, someone to serve and protect you. Someone to love you. That is why we guard intimacy like a precious jewel, because it is the only jewel worth giving to someone else.

And the Winner is...

We as a society speak in terms of winners and losers. If I were to ask you to describe to me what a loser is, certain people would come to your mind. Maybe even yourself. Words associated with losers are criminal, team, misfit, failure or bad. A loser is someone who consistently proves they are not worthy of respect. But when you think to yourself, "I'm such a loser," what you're really saying is that you have somehow failed at life. You are consistently proving to yourself your ineptitude at this game we call Being Human. 

Ok, so you are a loser. What does that mean? Even the loser gets to play. But that's not really what you want to hear, is it? What you want to hear is, "No! You're not a loser!" Ok, so you're not a loser. Do you feel better? No? Why not? I told you what you wanted to hear. In that case, let's try something else.

What does it mean to Be Human? In order to figure that out we have to go back a little bit. Rewind to before we were born. We all lived with Heavenly Father together. Chances are we've met before. Hello again. Anyways, we were presented with a choice. Heavenly Father's plan involved coming to earth, learning how to be like Him and one day return to Him to receive of the glory which we choose. Lucifer (who, by the way, was every bit our brother as Christ was) decided he didn't like that plan. He didn't want to see any of us perish because of bad choices. And he also wanted all the glory to himself. Maybe more so the latter. In any case, Lucifer proposed his plan, and maybe it sounded pretty good. None of us would be lost, what did we care who the glory went to? There was just one flaw in Lucifer's plan. You can't take glory away from the Father. It can only be given. So when he demanded the glory go to him, he set his will in defiance with the Father's. We took sides, and the mere fact that you are sitting in that chair with that rather stunned look on your face means that you chose not to follow Satan's plan. Congratulations, you won a free body! Unfortunately, bodies come with all sorts of things that Spirits don't. Like livers and pancreases. And hearts and brains. And hearts and brains develop very differently than our Spirit versions do. They are susceptible to decay, disease and malformation. And our emotions, which are tied to pretty much everything we do, came right along with this wonderful body. Isn't it great? Now, raise your hand if you have complete control over your emotions. Put your hand down. Even the "best" of us are prone to emotional hijackings. Some of you are wondering what "best" means. Well, that depends on you. So, think about that for a minute. Got the idea in your head? Great, now throw it out the window. Because who in the world are you to decide what's "best" as far as people go? Now I admit that the Avengers are the best at what they do. But they have superpowers. If you haven't got superpowers, forget it. Given the chance, we could all come up with a list of the "best" people we know of, historical or otherwise. Names like Abraham Lincoln or Martin Luther King would crop up quite a bit, probably. But they were only the best at being Abraham Lincoln and Martin Luther King. Some of you are laughing right about now, shaking your heads and saying, "Well duh!" But if they could only be the best at themselves, why do you have to be better than everyone you know, and even some people you don't? Because that's what being a loser means. It is a word that implies competition. Because if you're are a loser, somewhere out there is a winner. Which, as you can hopefully now see, is preposterous. The only way you can lose at being an imperfect human is if you stopped being human. And barring any zombie apocalypse, that ain't going to happen. So just be yourself. You, my friend (and I do not use that term lightly) are NOT a loser. You wish you were different? Change. Not tomorrow, not next Friday. Right now. That doesn't mean that everyone else will see the change tomorrow. But you will know, and so will God. Change takes practice. But if I can learn how to do multivariable calculus and quantum mechanics, you can do this. You can learn to not think of yourself as a loser. And that is the most important change you can possibly make, because it is the most self-fulfilling prophecy on the planet. In other words, if you think you're a loser, you will be. If you think you're a child of a loving Heavenly Father who expects nothing more than His imperfect human child can offer, then you will feel that, too. You'll feel love. Perfect love.

Ready? Go!

Sacrament Prayers Part 6

And now we come to the promise that is made to us if we promise to remember Him and keep His commandments. When I was a kid, I used to think this was a raw deal. We have to do all that and then all we get is one thing back? But what my underdeveloped sense of God's love could not comprehend was the import of the promise that we will always have His Spirit to be with us.

Other names for the Spirit are Comforter, Holy Ghost, Conscience and Spirit of Truth. Christ Himself said that the Holy Ghost would "teach [us] all things." The Holy Ghost was promised to His followers shortly before His death, because He wanted to assure them that He would still be with them, if not in body. I think about what that must have been like for His disciples, to have Jesus there with them to teach them and wrap them in His arms, and then to have Him tell them He would not always be there. How devastating that must have been! But what a comfort the Holy Ghost must truly have been, to fill the void left by Christ's departure. The Holy Ghost comforts as Christ did, teaches as Christ taught, guides as Christ guided. It is not in God's plan to have Christ on the earth right now, so He gave us Someone to help us feel His love for us now. In essence, the Holy Ghost is our access to God. It is through Him that inspiration is received, love is felt, sins are forgiven, direction perceived and a relationship with God is cultivated. The Holy Ghost is a member of the Godhead, along with our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. God wants to grant us the companionship of a member of the Godhead. Think about what that means for you.

Our relationship with God is based on positive feedback. When we keep the commandments, we receive the Holy Ghost, who helps us make correct choices and continue keeping the commandments. After which, we receive greater witness of our good standing with God and we feel His presence more strongly, through the Holy Ghost. And I testify that the more we feel the influence of the Holy Ghost, the happier we are and the less we feel inclined to berate ourselves or others. We want to be happy, we want to repent of our sins, we want to feel love and the clearer we see the world around us. God directs us in all aspects of our lives. Socially, emotionally, spiritually, physically, academically. When we allow the Holy Ghost to direct our lives, there is not a moment that He cannot help us, not a sadness He does not experience with us and no triumph He does not celebrate on our behalf. That is what it means to have the Holy Ghost with you. It means everything.

Sacrament Prayers Part 5

The next part differs from the bread to the water. They both start out with the phrase "that they may witness unto thee." To witness is to observe or experience personally. When one serves as a witness in a trial, they are giving account of something they were present for, or saw, or heard. You cannot witness to something that you don't have first-hand experience with. So when we partake of the Sacrament, we are witnessing, or giving personal testimony, that we will do the things that follow.

This is where they differ slightly. The only difference is that in the prayer over the bread, we witness that we are willing to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, in addition to other things. To take upon ourselves someone else's name is to identify with them, to take their creed upon ourselves, and to accept the consequences. When we take upon ourselves the name of Christ, we cannot do it lightly, because He did not do it lightly. Those who would criticize Him, will criticize us, and those who revile against Him will revile against us.

The rest of the promises on our end are the same in both prayers. We also witness to always remember Him. Here again is that all-important word, remember. If we would remember Him always, we would treat people differently, pray more fervently and act with more faith. That doesn't mean that other things aren't going to hold our attention, because that would defeat the purpose of this life; we came here to live and learn. But God isn't just in His Gospel; He is all around us, in all the beauty and creative minds that give us things to read and listen to. When we always keep in mind whether something is bringing us closer to the Spirit, then we are keeping Him in mind. And when we think of our fellow men as brothers and sisters, we remember Him.

Last of all, we witness to keep His commandments. I like to think that if we can keep the greatest commandment, then all others will follow. Christ Himself gave this commandment during His ministry. It is to love God with all thy heart, might, mind and strength. When we can truly do that, all others will fall into place, because when we love God, we want to show that love by following His commandments. When we love God, we can feel that those commandments are not to restrict or punish us but to bless and protect us. When we love God, we trust Him, fully and without any reservations. And that is true happiness.

Sacrament Prayers Part 4

The next phrase differs a little in each prayer, but only in minor verb usage. The emblems are being blessed to our souls, in order that we might perform this ordinance in remembrance of Him. Spencer W Kimball has said that the most important word in the English language is remember. The word appears 505 times in the Standard Works of the LDS Church, with 162 coming from the Old and New Testaments. Some of our favorite phrases that we shout at our kids as they run out the door contain this word: Remember who you are! Remember your lunch money! Remember I love you! Dictionary.com defines the word remember has "retain in the memory" or "recall to the mind". So we perform this act in remembrance of Him. By taking the Sacrament, if we do it properly, we remember Him, and His Sacrifice. We once again recall to our minds this wonderful gift. The Sacrament is the one time in the week that we can sit and think, specifically about the Savior. What a wonderful gift! Naturally, those of you who have children are thinking to yourselves that I haven't a clue what I'm talking about because the Sacrament is simply one more quiet moment in which the shrieks of your children become deafeningly obvious. But the Lord can make it a wonderful time for you, too. Just ask Him. He will answer because He loves you.

Second Chances

You just received a 40% on a test that is worth 30% of your grade. What is your reaction? Some of you would start to make a list of things you could work on, then come up with a plan, and get to work. Some of you would simply decide that this grade is a commentary on a fundamental flaw in your character, and simply give up, assuming you could never do better. The latter group might even think that there is no coming back from such a monumental mistake, that nothing you can do will ever make up for it. For you, there is no second chance.

But what if you could erase that grade? What if you could erase anything that might stand in your way of getting 100% on that next test? What if you could be assured that your hard work would pay off? There is such a second chance, you can erase all your mistakes and you can be assured that your hard work pays off. I know that because that is just what I have learned to believe recently, and it works.

This doesn't just apply to grades. I have struggled with friendships in the past, assuming that something I have said or done has ended all possibility of ever continuing that relationship. Part of that comes from experience and part of that comes from poor self-evaluations. But all of it is false.

The reality is that there is truth and there is error. And the truth of the matter is that one mistake does not do us in for life, let alone eternity. My failed relationships (we all have them, by the way), and my failed tests and my failed attempts at one thing or another are not footnotes in my book of life that read, "The moment Aubri screwed herself royally." They are moments when my emotions got the best of me, or when I didn't know something that would have been useful. They were moments of indecision or moments when a series of irritants blew up in my face to produce a wholly undesirable response in me. They weren't my finest moments, but neither were they my undoing. They weren't me. Who I am inside can change. I get to learn from my mistakes. I get to try to be better. I get to learn from the One who knows my heart as well as the hearts of those around me. I can't change other people or read their minds. But I can learn about myself.

My message is one of hope, and love. You are not royally screwed, no matter what you've done. You are still learning, still growing, and still capable of change. Anyone who doesn't understand or who is not inclined to wait around while you do, forgive them. It's not a commentary on you, or them, either. It simply is. The best way to begin is to let God in. If you need it, the Addiction Recovery Program of the LDS Church is available and amazing. You can find the twelve step manual, as well as other resources here: http://addictionrecovery.lds.org/?lang=eng. Let God in. Not just slightly or tritely, but completely and sincerely. Only then can you learn what to replace the negative beliefs with. For a long time I felt hopeless, I wanted to change but I didn't know what to change into. Now I know.

A long time ago, I wrote about armor, which is where the title of my blog comes from. We will, inevitably get chinks in our armor, because we are actively fighting this war. But they don't have to stay. We know an incredible Blacksmith, who can hammer them out and make our armor shiny and new again. By doing these things, what's how we do it. There is no other way, but there is indeed a Way.

Sacrament Prayers Part 3

Our relationship with God established, we proceed to ask for specific blessings. These blessings are quite possibly the most significant we could possibly ask, which is probably why it is done by the power of the Priesthood. The blessings are first, to bless, and second to sanctify, the bread and water to the souls of all those who partake of it.

To bless is to bestow favors. When we consider any blessing, whether it one we perceive as a personal blessing or a blessing that has been widely acknowledged, we are really recognizing God's hand in our lives. God bestows upon us blessings which we have deemed ourselves, according to our conduct, worthy to receive (D&C 130: 20-21). They can be anything from an extra bit of money that shows up when we need it, to the feeling of forgiveness that permeates our hearts. Thus, to bless is to give extra help. So what could possibly be meant by "bless...this bread (or water)"? I sincerely doubt that the Sacrament bread and water gives us any added nutrients or health benefits.

To sanctify, quite simply put, is to purify. We are sanctified by the blood of Christ, through the Atonement. Having paid the price, we are set free from the effects of sin, and our sins become as white as snow, as Isaiah so eloquently puts it. But, again, this is in regards to us personally, so what possible benefit could sanctifying the emblems have? Personally, I've never seen a fungus growing in my cup.

The key, then, is the phrase, "to the souls." That little two-lettered word denotes aiming toward something, or, in this case, someone. Specifically, you. The Sacrament is wrought with symbolism. The emblems remind us of something specific about the Savior's sacrifice. The bread represents His body, which he took again the third day in order to make possible the resurrection of mankind. The water represents His precious blood, which was shed both in the Garden and on the cross, during which times the Savior made possible our spiritual return to the Father. So, it is not the actual bread and water which are blessed and sanctified, but rather the actual sacrifice of the Savior. His sacrifice is blessed and sanctified to us, or given to us for our benefit. Those are the blessings that the Lord is already willing to grant, if we will only ask for them.

I think the next time I take the Sacrament, I will think differently about it.

Sacrament Prayers Part 2

Having established that the Sacrament Prayers are indeed prayers, one must consider the manner in which they begin. The very first words are an indication of who they are directed toward. Just as all prayers, they are meant for our Heavenly Father's ears. However, something very fundamental can be learned from what follows: "...we ask Thee, in the name of Jesus Christ...". Yes, we address Heavenly Father, but we do it in the name of Jesus Christ. The role of our Savior comes to light here. Christ is our advocate with the Father, and it is through His sacrifice that we obtain blessings from the Father. 

No one can deny the existence of God's law. Adam himself was given this law and put under covenant to obey it. But Adam was not perfect, just as none of us are. And without obedience to the law, there can be no exaltation, no blessings of any kind. In short, we would be damned, or stopped in our progress. We wouldn't be able to become better, or learn new things, because the Spirit would cease to strive with us. Without the Savior's Atonement, this very existence would be utterly wasted. 

But the wonderful, liberating reality is that He did perform the Atonement. He answered the very ends of God's law, He paid the price for when we have our imperfect moments. So that when we have them, we can turn to our Savior and obtain forgiveness once again, and the Spirit back. Anyone who has ever felt the loss of this gift can tell you, life is nothing without it. And once we have it back, we can continue to become more like the Savior.

Thus Jesus Christ becomes our advocate with the Father. This does not mean that God Himself does not hear our prayers, it simply means that we have someone standing next to us, to verify and give validity to our prayers, to say, "I have payed the price for their mistakes. Hear their pleas." So when, through the Priesthood, we ask for the blessings of the Sacrament to rest upon us, we can be assured that God will both hear and answer our prayers, because we ask in the name of Jesus Christ.

Sacrament Prayers Part One

I have begun to think in immense detail about the prayers that are said over the emblems of the Savior's sacrifice every week. They are short, sometimes even shorter depending on how nervous the Priest is who happens to be blessing it that week. Sometimes they have to be repeated. But they are always the same and they always make me think.

The first thing I realized about the Sacrament Prayers may sound fairly obvious. The Sacrament Prayers are prayers. There, I said it. But think about it. I have always thought of them as special words that are set apart from any others I send Heavenward. But they are prayers, just like the ones I say at my bedside. They may be said on my behalf, by the authority of the Priesthood, but they are prayers nonetheless. The Bible Dictionary says that "prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God, but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant, but that are made conditional on our asking for them." The blessings promised in these prayers are ones that God is already willing to grant. But God wants us to ask. Not for Him, He already knows our hearts. Partaking of the Sacrament and participating in those prayers is for us, so that we know that we indeed want what has been promised. We are also reminded of our part. Prayer itself is a form of work, and partaking of the Sacrament is quite possibly the most important work of our week. So the next time you listen to those words the Priest is saying, remember, they're not just words. It's a prayer.

Confessions from the Gym

I went to the gym the other day, which in and of itself was a triumph after over two months of avoiding it. The movie that was playing in the Cardio Cinema was Forever Strong. I love that movie, for many reasons. As I sat watching it, I thought about what it would be like to be part of a team that loves me as those boys loved Rick. He was an outcast, by all accounts an enemy, having previously played for the rival team. He was in their neck of the woods due to erratic and irresponsible behavior. They didn't have to show him the love and respect they did. But they did. And I started to wonder why. It was then the words to one of my favorite songs popped into my head. It's called Perfect Love, by Felicia Sorensen:

Perfect love, purest love 
Breaking through my anguish
Precious love, endless love
His love never fails me

And I realized that kind of love was what those boys were exhibiting. How often do we get to experience that? Love in spite of our faults. Love that causes us to want to be better. Have you ever experienced that kind of love? I realized that day that I have, and that I am. Eight months ago I started attending meetings for the Addiction Recovery Program, sponsored by LDS Family Services. And I have never felt love like that before in my life. The women I am privileged to meet on a weekly basis love me. I don't understand why or how, but I now know that they do. They love me because they understand something very fundamental about life: nobody is perfect, but we can all strive together to become so. Theirs is a perfect love. And so, I echo Alma, "If ye have felt to sing the song of redeeming love, I would ask, can ye feel so now (Alma 5:26)?"

I never thought to be able to say that I have done just that. But I submit to you now that I have sung the song of redeeming love for the first time. I may have felt a fraction before, but I never comprehended the full import of what it means to be loved by Heavenly Father. His love is all-reaching, all consuming and all-encompassing. All other love stems from this love. When we feel love for our fellow men, it is only by the grace of God.

Christ Himself taught us how to love, both those who accept it and those who don't. It is He who payed the ultimate price, making it possible for us to feel love. Without His great, last and everlasting sacrifice, we would know nothing of love.

This wonderful gift came from God. It came on His terms, in words I would understand and at the right time. He also gave me a quiet place to enjoy and contemplate it. Once again, all these things worked for my good.

I know that Christ lives, that He loves us, and is waiting with open arms to show us, as soon as we open our hearts. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet of God, that he restored these wonderful truths to bless our lives. I know that if we strive to do what is right, we can't go wrong.

Human Chemistry

In nature, all reactions want to end up at a lower energy level than they started in. The reason that Oxygen comes in molecules of two (O2) is because it costs less energy to hang out together than to go it alone. Some reactions require a catalyst. A catalyst lowers the energy necessary to get started, because sometimes it's just too much. Sometimes the catalyst is heat. Sometimes it is another molecule. Sometimes it is pressure. There are hundreds of examples.

Human nature is no different. Some things are relatively easy and require no real motivation. Like blinking. We don't require a reminder every few seconds that we need to blink; we simply do. But things that require faith sometimes require a catalyst. These motivations can come from anywhere. Sometimes, something is said to us that convinces us we need to change. Sometimes it is another person coming around who inspires you. Always, though, it is the still, small voice after all the wind and rending rocks. Because that's what all those other things are. Things to get us prepared to hear, and listen. We don't have to be as powerful as Elijah or as wise as Solomon in order to hear. And it doesn't matter what motivates us or whether we would have changed had it gone differently. What matters is that we do. Your body doesn't complain that you get your Vitamin C from oranges instead of cranberries. It doesn't care. It just knows that it has what it needs.

Heavenly Father always makes sure our spiritual bodies have what they need. Stop wondering about that. My favorite line from my favorite song says, "The Lord is on thy side." It's just a matter of whether you're on His.

Where You Are

Once upon a time, I watched a movie. A very minor character struck a chord with me. She was strong, smart and confident. And she had the best line of the whole movie. A long time later, I saw a commercial for a TV show. The name of the actress who played the main character struck a memory. I looked it up, and indeed, it was my once upon a time heroine. So, I started watching from the beginning. I hate coming in in the middle. Well, I loved it. And not just because it was my favorite person. She was playing a completely different heroine. But the new character became my new heroine. Or rather, was added to my list of heroines. Then something happened to my newest heroine that was very similar to my own life right then. And I made decision to better my life based on her good decision. She is not perfect, but she made a perfect decision at the perfect time.

What startled me was that once upon a time I was inspired by a character, committed the actress's name to memory and recalled it when I really needed it. Was that movie made just for me? I doubt it. Was that casting director inspired to cast that particular actress, in either the movie or TV show? Maybe. Is it a coincidence that any of this happened? Absolutely not. I looked up the other movies this actress has been in. Most of them are Rated R, except for that one that I saw.

God speaks to us in our own language. And not necessarily our spoken language. Some of you have heard of the Five Love Languages. Some of us speak Book, Movie, Music or Sports. God speaks to all of us in a language we can hear. So even if He can't physically be by our side, He can speak to us. We just have to listen - everywhere.